What Palace resorts are adult only?
Let’s cut to the chase: adults need vacations from other people’s vacation choices. If your idea of paradise involves zero rogue pool noodles, uninterrupted naps, and cocktails that *aren’t* accidentally sipped by tiny humans named Braxton, Palace Resorts has your back. But which ones? Buckle up, buttercup.
Le Blanc Spa Resort Cancun: Where “Juice Box” Isn’t in the Vocabulary
This is the crème de la adult-only crème. Le Blanc Spa Resort Cancun is so blissfully kid-free, even the seagulls seem to whisper instead of squawk. Think butlers who’ll fetch your margarita before you finish blinking, spa treatments that melt stress like a popsicle in July, and a pool scene where the only “floaties” are inflatable swans for your Instagram. Pro tip: If you spot a toddler here, it’s either a mirage or a very lost CEO.
Sun Palace Cancun: Romance, Rum, and Zero Runny Noses
The OG of adult-only in the Palace family, Sun Palace is where lovebirds and “I just want to read my book in peace” birds collide. All-inclusive means unlimited sushi, top-shelf tequila, and couples’ massages that may or may not result in accidental snoring. No kids = no judgment. Just you, your significant other (or your newfound BFF from the swim-up bar), and the sweet sound of silence. Unless you’re screaming on the jet ski. That’s allowed.
- Moon Palace Cancun’s The Grand – Atelier Playa Mujeres: Okay, technically part of Moon Palace, but The Grand’s Atelier Playa Mujeres wing is an adults-only sanctuary. Imagine a resort so chic, even the palm trees look like they’ve had a spa day. Gourmet dining, mixology classes, and a beach where the only sandcastles are metaphorical (built from your crushed deadlines).
Wait, but why no kids? Because sometimes you want to discuss existential dread over breakfast mimosa flights without a 7-year-old loudly debating the merits of ketchup as a food group. Palace’s adult-only spots are where “responsibility” goes to die—temporarily, of course. Unless you count remembering your room key as a responsibility. Good luck with that.
How many rooms does Saturn Palace have?
Ah, the age-old question: “How many rooms does Saturn Palace have?” It’s like asking how many rings Saturn has—except these rooms come with mini-fridges and questionable abstract art. The answer? Let’s just say if you tried to count them all, you’d need more fingers than a starfish convention. And possibly a time machine.
The Short Answer (Because We Know You’re Impatient)
Officially, Saturn Palace boasts 417 rooms. Unofficially? There’s a closet on the 5th floor that may or may not be a portal to Narnia. We don’t talk about that. The management insists it’s “just a brooms closet,” but why does it hum Vivaldi at midnight? Coincidence? Probably.
The Long Answer (Because Why Not?)
- Standard Rooms: 300. Perfect for humans, introverts, and anyone who’s ever cried over a lost suitcase.
- Suites: 100. Fancy enough to make your cat judge you for not living here full-time.
- Mystery Rooms: 17. These include the “Room of Perpetual Muffin Scents” and the “Chamber Where Your Phone Suddenly Gets 5G.” Science hasn’t explained them yet.
Wait, math fans—that’s only 417 if you ignore the “Oops, We Forgot This One” Wing. Rumor has it, every full moon, a new room appears. Or maybe it’s just the lobby bar’s espresso martinis talking. Either way, bring a map. Or a GPS. Or a sacrificial offering to the front desk. Your call.
What happened to Isla Mujeres Palace resort?
Once upon a time, in a land of turquoise waters and suspiciously perfect Instagram backdrops, the Isla Mujeres Palace Resort decided to pull a “David Copperfield” and vanish. Well, sort of. In 2022, the resort underwent a spicy rebranding tango, shedding its “Palace” skin like a sunburnt tourist after a tequila mishap. It’s now known as Secrets Impression Isla Mujeres – a name so fancy it probably requires a tuxedo just to say it out loud.
Why the Identity Crisis? 🕵️
Rumor has it the resort’s midlife crisis involved:
- A sudden urge to upgrade its infinity pools to “infinity-and-beyond” pools (thanks, Buzz Lightyear).
- A desire to confuse Google Maps users for sport.
- An existential debate about whether “palace” was too humble a term for its 24-karat gold toilet paper (unconfirmed, but plausible).
In reality, it’s part of a corporate reshuffle by AMResorts to slap the “Secrets Impression” label on properties that scream “we have a butler who folds your napkin into origami swans.”
Did It Disappear Like Atlantis? 🌊
Fear not, beach bum pilgrims! The resort didn’t sink into the Caribbean Sea (though that would’ve made a killer Pirates of the Caribbean crossover). Instead, it got a glow-up. Think: new name, same absurdly photogenic sunsets, plus added perks like “unlimited gourmet dining” and “personalized service” – which we assume means someone will fan you with palm fronds while you nap. The only thing missing? An explanation for why rebranding hotels feels like witness protection for buildings.
So, if you show up asking for “Isla Mujeres Palace,” prepare for a friendly correction – and possibly a margarita-themed intervention. The resort’s still there, just with a fancier hat.
What is the new name for Palace Resorts?
Hold onto your sunhats and margarita glasses, folks, because Palace Resorts has decided to spice things up like a habanero-infused tequila shot. The new name? Palace Resorts & Grand Moon Palace. Yes, you read that right. They’ve added a lunar twist, presumably because Earth-bound luxury was just too mainstream. Rumor has it the rebranding team took inspiration from a late-night brainstorming session involving a telescope, a piña colada, and a dare to “make it sound intergalactic, but keep the free WiFi.”
Breaking Down the Name (Because Why Not?)
- Palace Resorts: The OG. Still here, still fabulous, still hogging all the best beachfront real estate.
- Grand Moon Palace: The new kid on the cosmic block. Not actually on the moon (disappointing, we know), but probably has better pool parties than any crater up there.
Wait, Did They Actually Move to the Moon?
Let’s squash this like a rogue coconut falling by the pool: no. The “Grand Moon Palace” is less about astronaut training and more about reminding you that their resorts are *out of this world*. Think celestial-themed cocktails, moonlit mariachi bands, and a loyalty program that might one day include points for space travel. (Hey, a traveler can dream.)
So why the name change? Officially, it’s to reflect their expanded portfolio. Unofficially, we suspect someone just really wanted to say “Grand Moon Palace” without getting side-eyed. Whatever the reason, rest assured: the rebrand still includes all-you-can-eat guacamole. And if that’s not the real meaning of luxury, we’ll eat our sombreros. 🌮
