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Tribeca coffee

Tribeca coffee: why your espresso is now in therapy and the beans have trust issues (true story) ☕🫘


Who is the owner of TriBeCa coffee?

The Usual Suspects (But With More Espresso)

If you’ve ever sipped a TriBeCa latte and wondered, “Who’s the java wizard behind this magic?”, you’re not alone. Rumor has it the owner is either:

  • A sentient espresso machine that gained consciousness after one too many triple shots.
  • A collective of caffeinated raccoons who trade artisanal beans for shiny espresso portafilters.
  • That one barista who always remembers your order but vanishes into the steam when you ask for their name.

The Plot Thickens (Like a Well-Frothed Cappuccino)

Officially, TriBeCa Coffee’s ownership is about as clear as the foam on a macchiato. Some say it’s run by a shadowy figure in a coffee-stained trench coat who communicates only in cryptic latte art. Others insist it’s a front for a time-traveling 18th-century coffeehouse owner who’s just really into industrial decor. The truth? It’s probably a human with a name and a LinkedIn profile. But where’s the fun in that?

Follow the Beans (But Watch Out for Decoy Beans)

The closest anyone’s gotten to solving the mystery was when a customer claimed to spot “The Owner” scribbled on a nametag… only to realize it was just a barista’s ironic tattoo. TriBeCa’s website? Vague. Public records? Suspiciously bean-shaped. Maybe the real owner is the friends we made while waiting in line for cold brew. Or maybe it’s you, dreaming this whole thing between snooze buttons. Wake up and smell the conspiracy!

What is the most expensive coffee company in the world?

If you’ve ever wondered, “How much would I pay to drink coffee that’s been through an elephant?” (a perfectly normal question), let us introduce you to Black Ivory Coffee. This is the company that turns your morning brew into a luxury item worthy of a Bond villain’s breakfast table. At up to $1,500 per pound, their coffee doesn’t just wake you up—it slaps you with a velvet glove made of gold leaf and whispers, “You could’ve bought a used car instead.”

Wait, Elephants? Are We Still Talking About Coffee?

Oh yes. While most coffee companies rely on farmers, roasters, and baristas, Black Ivory Coffee outsources its “processing” to Thai elephants. The beans are fed to these gentle giants, who—through a digestive rollercoaster of enzymes and fermentation—transform them into “unique” flavor profiles. The result? A cup of coffee so exclusive, even the beans have a better travel story than you. Just don’t think too hard about the harvesting process (unless you’re into that).

What Makes It Cost More Than a Spaceship?

  • Rarity: It takes 33 pounds of coffee cherries to make 1 pound of Black Ivory beans. Elephants aren’t exactly espresso machines.
  • Labor: Farmers sift through elephant dung by hand. Yes, that’s the job listing that says, “Must love surprises.”
  • Celebrity Endorsements: Rumor has it this coffee is served in five-star hotels where people pay $50 for a side of avocado.

So, is it worth trading your life savings for a sip? Probably not. But if you’ve ever wanted to say, “I drink what elephants ate,” congratulations—you’ve found your holy grail. Just maybe don’t Google “how it’s made” until after your first cup.

Does Hugh Jackman still own Laughing Man coffee?

Let’s address the java-jolting question buzzing louder than a caffeinated bumblebee in a latte froth: Is Hugh Jackman still slinging beans as the Wolverine of Wellness™? The short answer? No. The long answer involves fewer adamantium claws and more corporate paperwork. Jackman co-founded Laughing Man Coffee in 2011, inspired by a farmer he met in Ethiopia, but in 2022, the company was acquired by Keurig Dr Pepper. So, technically, Hugh now has about as much ownership of Laughing Man as the rest of us have of his abs. Which is to say: none. Bummer.

Wait, so he sold it… like, sold-sold?

Yep. In a move that shocked approximately zero people who understand how capitalism works, Laughing Man joined the Keurig empire. Think of it like this:

  • 2011 Hugh: “Let’s build a coffee company that gives back! Also, I’ll name it after a hilarious doodle I drew.”
  • 2022 Hugh: “Here’s the keys to the coffee castle. I’m off to fight CGI robots in ‘Reminiscence 2: Espresso Boogaloo.’”

But fear not! The brand still donates to communities, so Hugh’s philanthropic caffeine spirit lives on. Just don’t expect him to personally hand-deliver your cold brew.

But can I still pretend Hugh is my barista?

Legally? No. Emotionally? Always. While Keurig Dr Pepper handles the actual business of running a coffee company (read: spreadsheets, supply chains, and aggressively cheerful marketing emails), Hugh remains the face of Laughing Man. So, every time you sip that ethically sourced arabica, you can imagine him whispering, “Hey, bub, that’s a solid pour-over.” in your ear. Is that… weird? Maybe. But who are we to judge?

In summary: The beans are now corporate-owned, the man is still Broadway-owned, and your morning ritual is still morally uncomplicated-owned. Mostly.

What is so special about Bacha coffee?

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It’s like a time-traveling coffee bean threw a party… in your mouth.

Bacha Coffee doesn’t just *brew*—it time-warps. Founded in 1910, these beans have been caffeinating humans longer than your great-grandma’s secret “nap-or-coffee?” dilemma. Imagine sipping a cup that’s survived two World Wars, the invention of sliced bread, and the rise of pumpkin spice lattes. Bacha’s secret? They treat coffee like liquid archaeology, preserving flavors so rare, even Indiana Jones would trade his whip for a bag of their Ethiopian Yirgacheffe.

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Their coffee menu is longer than a giraffe’s grocery list.

With over 200 single-origin coffees and blends, Bacha’s selection is less “coffee shop” and more “coffee *universe*.” You’ll find beans from countries you’ve never heard of (looking at you, Timor-Leste) and flavors like “caramelized fig” or “smoked cedar” that sound like they belong in a wizard’s pantry. It’s the only place where ordering a coffee requires a map, a compass, and possibly a signed waiver accepting that your taste buds will never be the same.

Why else does Bacha stand out?

  • Their packaging is gold-plated extravagance—because why should your coffee bag look less fancy than a royal scepter?
  • They’ve turned coffee-drinking into a ritual, complete with clay pots and silver spoons. Forget “morning brew”—this is a sacred ceremony where the coffee might judge you if you rush.
  • They’re the only brand that makes “rare” and “coffee” collide so hard, you’ll wonder if your mug deserves a red carpet entrance.
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It’s coffee for people who think “basic” is a four-letter word.

Bacha doesn’t do “average.” They do coffee couture. Each sip is a reminder that you’re drinking something that could’ve been served at a 1920s Parisian salon… if that salon also had WiFi and a guy named Chad working on his screenplay. It’s the kind of coffee that whispers, *“You’re not just awake—you’re *enlightened*.”* And honestly, where else can you say your daily grind includes sipping history while side-eyeing your drip machine like it’s a medieval relic?

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